The closing for our home in upstate NY was originally scheduled for December 15, but was changed to December 28 since the buyers were going out of town. Today, I took all the real estate closing documents to a notary to get finalized and sent back to the attorney.
As I stood there signing my name in about 20 different places, it occurred to me that with each signature (literally signing my life away), I'm further away from the home that Matt and I built together and started our life in. The home in which we brought first Jacob to, and then Sydney. The home we made wonderful memories in and filled with love. Signing those documents ended up to be tougher than I thought it would be.
I flashed back so vividly to when Matt and I sat together at the large rectangular table in an office where we signed our names in about 50 different places to start our home together. I remember feeling the emotions from that moment - stomach-flipping excitement, stress about now holding a mortgage, but mostly happiness and feeling so grown up.
As I was signing today, it was the first time I felt a twinge of regret, thinking maybe I should have stayed there and held onto it for the kids since their daddy built it, but the feeling only lasted for a moment. I know I made the right decision for us at this time in our lives.
It's just so hard to let go. Our beautiful home. Our beautiful life.