It's ironic that I would start this blog when I did. I've always relied on Matt to be my memory - he had the memory of an elephant. I have the memory of a knat. I figured I'd better start writing stuff down so I can look back on it - maybe not to have to rely on Matt?
The memorial service we had for him was really something else. It was packed, there were people standing all over the place that couldn't find seats, more people standing outside in the cold because the building was filled to capacity, and some people that ended up going home because they couldn't get in. I'd say there were probably over 200 people there. It was really heartwarming to see how many people he touched in his life, and how much everyone loved him. It wasn't a surprise to me, though. He was incredibly special. He would do anything for anyone. He had a giving heart, as big as could be. He had a great sense of humor, and always made people smile. He was a prankster. He kept it real and said it like it was. He was brutally honest. He was comforting, strong, made me feel safe and secure, and loved me like no one else could or will ever love me. Just read the comments in his guestbook. The guestbook with his obituary. I can't believe I'm talking about an obituary for my husband. http://www.legacy.com/BuffaloNews/DeathNotices.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonId=120308242
His favorite thing to do was take Jacob for bike rides in town - for hours. Jacob has a love for bike riding just like his daddy. He even took his training wheels off this summer because he's so proficient. He took Jacob to train shows, monster truck shows, air shows, drove him to Altoona, PA to see trains in person and ride in one. He lived for his children. I'm so thankful that we have so many pictures to capture many of the moments we had.
I can't believe I have to live the rest of my life without him. I can't believe my children are going to barely remember their daddy, if at all. I can't believe any of this. Someone PLEASE wake me up from this horrifying nightmare!!!!